Berlin Hash’s Little Songbook
HE/SHE IS A REALLY NICE GUY/GIRL
He (She) is a really nice guy (girl)
But he’s (she’s) got a small dick (clit)
And all it does it drip, drip, drip!
Drink it down-down-down
WHY WAS HE BORN SO BEAUTIFUL?
Why was he born so beautiful,
Why was he born at all?
He’s no fucking use to anyone,
He’s no fucking use at all!
He may be a joy to his mother,
But he is a pain in the arsehole to us
Drink it down-down-down
YOU’RE STUPID
You’re stupid,
You’re stupid,
You’re really fucking dumb!
If it wasn’t for your Mother,
You’d be a spot(stain) of cum!
Drink it down-down-down
WE’VE GOT VIRGINS
We’ve got virgins,
We’ve got virgins,
On (At) our hash,
On (At) our hash,
Gonna get them fucked up,
Gonna get them fucked up,
Down the hatch,
Down the hatch,
Drink it down-down-down
HOW MUCH BEER
Tune: “An die Freude”/Anthem of Europe by Ludwig van Beethoven
How much beer has he/she been drinking,
he/she is looking mighty lit.
As we stand here are we thinking:
do we really give a shit.
Who’s that wanker,
so unseemly
that his/her mum would surely frown.
Grab your beer and hold it firmly,
drink it, drink it, down, down, down,
down, down, down, down, down, down,
down, down, down, down, down, down, down.
THE FINAL DOWN-DOWN
Tune: “The Final Countdown” by Europe
You’re leaving us, hasher,
And so it’s farewell
But maybe you’ll come back,
To hash, who can tell?
And though there is no one to blame,
You’re leaving town,
(You’re leaving town),
Will trails ever be the same again?
It’s the final down-down …
He Drinks it Down
Tune: “Tubthumping” by Chumpa Wampa
He/She drinks it down,
but it comes up again
Never can keep it down
He/She drinks it down,
but it comes up again
He/She never can keep it,
down, down, down, down…
You’re a Shitty Hare
Tune: Livin’ on a prayer by Bon Jovi (Burlington Mardi Gras 2011)
Original: http://www.hmhhh.com/index.php?log=s_shittyhare.con
Notes: Sung to hares for shit-tastic trails. Written by Krusty the Meat Miser.
You should’ve used more flour and chalk
We followed your marks
They said “You’ve been fucked”
It sucked
It sucked
We wanted to drink Magic Hat (Berliner Weisse)
But lost on your trail
We’d have settled for Pabst (Kindl)
You suck
You suck
(It is common to replace Magic Hat / Pabst with local beers )
You’ve got to hold on to the drink you’ve got
It doesn’t make a difference if it’s beer or a shot
This is for the tit checks you forgot “on trail” (NOTE: Show tits)
You’re drinking a lot!
Ohhh, there was no beer out there
Ohhh oh, you’re a shitty hare
Take some flour, and use it on trail
Ohhh oh, you’re a shitty hare
You’re a shitty hare! (NOTE: Simulate 80s hair band awesomeness)
Technology on trail
Tune: America the Beautiful
Technology was made for porn, it was not made for trail.
Technology, used properly, can help you get some tail.
Technology, technology, just leave that shit at home.
Your camera, your GPS, your fucking mobile phone!
Let me pee
Tune: “Let It Be” by The Beatles
When I go out hashing,
And Mother Nature calls to me,
There must be a bathroom,
Let me pee,
Let me pee,
Oh, let me pee,
There must be a bathroom,
Let me pee,
Sometime I go openly,
And other times against a tree,
There must be a bathroom,
Let me pee
Let me pee,
Oh, let me pee,
There must be a bathroom,
Let me pee